Baxter's 7th Birthday

It's my sweet Baxter's 7th birthday today :) I can't believe how quickly time flies!! 

13 Random Facts about Me

1. I'm terrified of spiders.  Like squealing, chills down my spine and sweating profusely.  Not an attractive look. LOL
2. I rarely drink.
3. I quit smoking just over 3 years ago.  I still miss it. Sigggggh.  But I feel better and I know my lungs and heart appreciate it.
4. I have a weakness for Cool Ranch Doritos.
5. I am obsessed with Great Danes, more particularly Harlequins.
6. I never or rarely change my body jewelry.
7. I'm willing to take Benadryl to be around animals that I am allergic to (cats).
8. I'm horribly accident prone/clumsy.
9. I've had braces on my teeth twice.
10. I had jaw surgery when I was 15 years old.
11. I love order.  As is, clutter is chaos.  I've learned to let go A LOT since I've been with Jeff.
12. Jeff and I have been together nearly 13 years and married for six.
13. My fave alcoholic drink would have to be ameretto sours.

Is this not the cutest, EVER?!!  My neighbour and friend of ours saw these at a craft show I think she said she was at and she just couldn't resist.  They slide onto the collars.

 And lest we not forget a Tuesday selfie. LOL

 

It's Friday, which means the weekend is just mere hours away!!

So my 31st birthday has come and gone just like that.  I ended up going home after my BodyShred class on Monday at 1 pm.  Went home and by the time I rolled in the door it was 3:30 and from there until the time that Jeff got home (not long after 5), I tidied up, had some crap tv on in the background for noise while I snuggled with my boys on the couch.  We hung out for a couple of hours, then later we met up with my step-dad and mom for dinner.  They then came over after dinner to have dessert and to get the dogs who had a grooming appointment early Tuesday morning.

Now it's Friday and here I am sitting at my desk at work just willing the hours to go by so that my weekend can begin.  Jeff is taking the dogs over to my mom's this afternoon so they can spend the weekend with her while we head up north with Tara and Erik.  They're coming up for a mini getaway weekend and we're going to take them to the gun range to play.  Should be a good/fun weekend but dang it, it's going to be a chilly one.  It's supposed to be a low of -7 Celsius.  Yep, I'm in deep denial over here about the impending winter season coming.  It's fucked up because not three days ago it felt like spring and it was about 14 degrees and then the next day winter.  BAM!  So I finally caved yesterday and pulled out the winter jacket.  Yep, winter is here.  Sigh.

Canada Day 2014

 
My Canada Day this past Tuesday involved going swimming, because it was just simply too hot to do anything BUT swim.  At our friend, Bruce's, of course. 

The pictures start the previous day where I did a double at the gym.. First I did a 45 minute BodyPump class and then had 20 minute break, which followed with a BodyShred Class.  I felt A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!!!  I was completely soaked but whatevs!  The pic to the left is me scarfing down a hard boil egg for some energy to get through the second class.

And of course, we can't do a post without including one or two pics of the fluffs.  This time it's my wee precious Baxter :)

Pool head                                                                                    

 On our patio  

 Poor little Baxter, just tuckered right out.  You know he's happy as a clam when he's snoozing on his back and you can see his little white teeth.  I call that Happy Baxter. :)

 And some more from Canada Day at Bruce's

I haven't been taking as many pictures lately because I've tried to limit my cell use, so that's why there aren't a trillion pictures. :)

Easter Long Weekend!

I had a friend come down for a visit on Thursday night, which was nice. Friday morning we went up White Feather and Heronview. Of course the highlight of the road trip was seeing all of Lori's, her beloved four Leonbergers…

Below is Kramer, 185 lbs of fur and love :).  The second Leo is Emma getting in on some of the love. She's one of his daughter's I believe. 

 

Later Friday night we went to my moms for Easter dinner, which was delish! Kelly stayed for dinner then headed back home to the 'Shwa. 

 

Saturday morning I went to the gym (duh! Lol these days I'm at the gym 7 days a week if I can) and then I came home and we went down to the All About Pet Show near the airport.  I didn't take too many pictures because I was too busy gawking at the animals or petting them.  If Jeff lost me, he didn't have to look out to find me but rather down because I was often on the floor petting this dog or that dog. 

 

Isn't this Persian adorable?  He was just a baby, if I recall his owner said he was just 9 months old but glorious.  :)

I'm not a fan of snakes but took some reptile pictures nevertheless.  Here's a rattle snake and a tarantula.

Cute little Chi's

Some baby goats and a young cow (she was super soft)

This is what I look like in the morning lol  Here's an alpaca. 

 

Got home on Saturday and took the kids for a nice long walk.  This walk put Charlie on his ass for two days.  Poor boy looked wrecked.  Maybe it was too much?  Who knows.  But he's alright. :) 

My massive quads and day 20 of #yogatothecore - Tittibhasana or firefly pose.

And some random ducks trolling down the street on Monday morning lol

Wednesday/Thursday morning pictures....

Charlie snugglin'. 

Mr. Baxter, all in his glory sleeping. :)

You see, when you see Baxter laying upside down on his back, that's a happy boy right there.

The sunrise Thursday morning walking to the train. Cold out but beautiful. 

Open letter and my weekend

I feel like my heart is breaking and there isn't a god damn thing I can do about it. No matter what I say, what I do, or how long, I'm going to pay the rest of my life for my past mistakes and short comings. I never said I was perfect, I've been so open and raw and vulnerable to the real me, the real person beneath it all...  but I just feel like I'm never going to be the person you want me to be. I will never be this perfect person you so seemingly are trying to find within me... 

Twelve years ago I opened my heart when I shut everyone and everything out. I broke my walls down to my vulnerability.... And now because you feel justified and righteous, I will forever be trying to apologize and make it up to you for being a monster. I can't keep saying I'm sorry for the rest of my life when it's more than just me. Own your shit, let shit go. Stop throwing everything in my face and let it GO. Stop holding everything over my head as ammunition to justify how you feel. I'm trying so hard to be a better, more caring, honest and open person but Im not the one that can make you happy. YOU are the creator of your own happiness... 

I opened my heart and told you I couldn't have my heart broken any more....and my heart is breaking because we're falling apart and it's up to me to bandaid it back together. I never mattered to anyone before you and it breaks me into a million pieces when you tell me you've been unhappy for years... And yet, I'm still here.... Because I love you and I just can't walk away. :( 

---------

Not having a great last 36 hours. Had a amazing breaking with our good friend Dina while watching the Canada vs.  Sweden hockey game this morning. Jeff was supposed to go to a match with his dad and brother but bailed on them last minute... This afternoon I met up with some old work friends from one of my first jobs back when I was 15. Nice to see the girls and it's so awesome that after all these ears we still get together to catch up. <3 

Goodnight. 

Well that was truly a nice, relaxing long weekend....

So I last wrote on Friday after I got home from work that evening.  That evening, I made a chicken stir fry and then afterwards I took the dogs down to Dina's and vented to her for a couple of hours.  It was actually a nice evening with her.  Upon going back up to our condo at around midnight, I ended up talking to J til about 2 a.m.  I ended up waking up at 8 am but then I guess I fell back asleep and I woke up again at 10 am to my phone ringing.  It was my mom checking in to say that she was coming over to get me and the dogs so that we could go out to White Feather and Heronview Raw and Natural.  Brian drove my mom and I and we were out for maybe 5 hours all said and doine (since Jeff had abandoned ship on Friday to go get some space up north for a few days at his parents, which I understood and respected once I was done with being upset and miffed).  My friend Kelly met up with us for lunch and we walked around for a bit buying a few items along the way.  Afterwards, Kelly was going to meet a friend for dinner (and then coming up to our place late to stay the rest of the weekend) and Mom and Brian and I went to Heronview, where they picked up dog food and I found my man Kramer, a 185 lb Leonberger and his daughter and another female and her daughter. So FOUR big beasts and I was in heaven.  I ended up getting the dogs a stuffless stuffie toy since they love those so much and I also got some Buffalo beef jerkey looking stuff for them as a treat too. 

Kelly ended up coming over around midnight Saturday night and we ended up talking in bed until 2 am.

 Look at these two hambergers. LOL What a life!

 

And I just LOVE this. Found this on Instagram over the weekend :)

And here's Miss Kelly with Charlie and Baxter both.  Charlie was all over her like a wet noodle, he just wouldn't leave her alone at all this past weekend.  Baxter warmed up to her a bit but she's certainly not Mom aka Me.  We spent Sunday morning doing her laundry and watching crap on tv.  We then went to get some groceries and not long after that, Jeff was home.  I was under the impression he was still up north but he ended up surprising me and coming home early, around 3:30ish.  We didn't do too much the rest of the day except chat and watch the boob tube and the Olympics.  We all fell asleep watching the Wolf of Wall Street (we'd seen it twice already and it was Kelly's first time watching it) and then shortly after I woke up and told Kelly lets go to bed (Jeff was sleeping on the couch Sunday night and Kelly and I in our bedroom). 

Woke up relatively early, made breakfast while Kelly was in the shower and she ended up leaving our place around 10:30/11 am to go meet her ex-husband so she could pick up her son and take him to a Hockey Day.  Monday was Family Day so it was a nice long weekend, to say the least.  The next long weekend is at Easter in April, which seems an awfully long time away.  :-/  Kelly will be back in 3 weeks to spend the weekend with me which I'm excited about.  Love that girl.  And I know the dogs, particularly Charlie will be happy about that.  He just adores her :)

And then this morning... Poor dogs, this is how I left them when leaving for work at 6 am.  LOL