What started off as a nice weekend ended in disaster.. Many, many hurtful things have been thrown out there, many of them which can't be taken back or forgotten.  I don't know which was is up or down right now but I'm barely treading above water.. I don't know how we ever got to this place..We both have now said that getting married was probably the stupidest idea... He wanted to make my mom happy with marrying her only child.  For us, it's only been down hill since then.  So many people have said that while I've had so many accomplishments in 2012, I've changed.  I've changed, he's changed, everything has changed.  It's like we're two strangers passing eachother in the night.  I feel completely off the rails and I nearly checked myself into the hospital last night.  I can't take this heart, this pain... This.  This is literally killing me inside.

I've let so many people down, but most of all myself.  I don't know how to fix it anymore.  I'm such a disappointment.

Time will tell, won't it.....