How do you know when you're ready to have children? Or are you ever ready? Everyone is having babies. People that I used to go to school with, many that I never thought would have kids, they're ALL having kids. I teeter all the time. Sometimes I think I want to, other times I don't think I'd be a good mother at all. Yesterday, while driving home from up north visiting Jeff's parents for the weekend, Jeff and I were talking about his brother's kids and how little respect, manners and courtesy for people, ANYONE. They just do as they please and it's okay because Jeff's brother's does nothing to rectify or show them the errs in their ways. He wants to be their friend. You can be your children's friend but you also are their parent, too. Jeff's brother's kids get away with murder, and it happened by virtue of their mother passing away 5 years ago. Don't get me wrong, it was tragic, it was sudden, it was traumatic and a difficult thing for Jeff's brother, and his three kids but everyone has their own traumas, everyone has their own issues and stories... But it is no crutch or reason to excuse the behaviour either. I lost my Dad when I was 2 years old and I could go on and on how shitty it was and feel sorry for me, blah blah blah but I didn't turn into an asshole simply because I lost one parent. But, you cannot go through the motions of life and treat people like shit and think you're going to always get your way. Life doesn't work that way.
In some ways, I think Jeff and I would make good parents because we'd do everything in our power not to let our kid(s) be the things that we are so passionately against and things that we stand up for. No way would I let a child of mind not have manners and respect one another. I think humble is the word I'm looking for. I would want a child of mind to be appreciative, kind, well-mannered, respectful, HUMBLE... Not just some kid running rampant around, going through life all willy-nilly like life owes them something.
On the other hand, what if I'd be a horrible mother? I don't know if I have it in me...... Or if I'd be the over-protective annoying OCD mother? Or the coddling type? Who knows.
Just ponderings...
Had a nice weekend up north despite getting mauled by blackflies, deer flies and horse flies. My neck looks like its been butchered! lol
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